we did it. 406 days as husband and wife.
i've been trying - for weeks - to write this post and every time, i erase it and start all over. i just cannot find the words to describe any of it. at times it feels like our knot was just freshly tied (newlywed-feels forever!) at others, it feels like this is the way it's always been - easy, straightforward, no bullshit, barebones LOVE.
it's been a year.
pretty piddly in the grand scheme of FOREVER, but still cause to celebrate, amirite?!
this year has been an incredible one. i've learned more about myself and what it means to be me than i have since i was a sulky, studded-belt-with-everything, loud-music-listening, boy-crazy teenager. and (i think) it's partly because i've given so much of myself to myles, to our marriage. in turn, he has done the same and i've received so much of him, from him, my soulmate. we've grown up, but have grown together. we've laughed more, loved deeper, had a brush with death* and bounced back with even more life. we're passionate and we hold romance in high esteem. (even if it sometimes comes in the form of a "greasiest hits" mixtape?) we make our own fun wherever we go (examples include but are not limited to: doctor's visits, cleaning a disgusting apartment, the most redundant class @ the TPL), but also carve out time for ourselves to sharpen our respective crafts and recharge our batteries.
i can't pretend that our life together has always been a fairytale, but it has definitely been a dream come true. (dreams aren't always perfect, are they?) we can be real with each other - open, honest and raw - something i am so grateful for. we can show each other our ugliness, our innermost selves without fear of judgement or scrutiny. although we may not always like what we see in each other, our love is always there at work behind the scenes, softening us where there could be more give and strengthening us separately so we work better together. we've learned time and time again that communication. is. key. it's in these times that we really learn what we're made of - ourselves, each other, our relationship. it's not perfect, but what is? it's a thrill to wake up next to a man that loves me fiercely, that i cannot wait to talk to at the end of a long day, and one that i most certainly cannot keep my hands off of. even if he does eat all the chips sometimes... o.O
in short: marriage has made me a better person with a love that grows exponentially every day. but enough of all that.
a year IS cause to celebrate and celebrate we did! in montreal! by eating! eating everything good! like smoked tomatoes!
below are a handful of frames from our long weekend en ville. one of the rolls i shot was an ancient spool of kodak royal gold 1000 that was over twenty years old, soooo... shit. i was able to save a few but the rest i'll have to keep on the inside of my eyelids. they'll be there when i close them to remember what we did at 365 days, husband and wife.